world aids day


I was the generation after the plauge- where the exhaustion moved in- where die ins and kiss ins and roberts no longer ruled meetings in basements.

i came in with the juno twins of protease inhibtors and azt- the ones that saved our lives (our- no one i know died of it) but depended on vulturus drug companies to provide them.
what did those meetings do- what did the research and the discourse and the arguments do ? what did the theories about fort derek do ? what did act up change ? what about the un comitteee on hiv and aids, what can the fags and africans and the immigrants and the iv drug users have in common ?

there are those who think its not HIV, there are those that think (important those, nobel prize winning those) who think that the african strain comes from hunger and the american strain comes from pleasure

hiv was falling, and siph was rising and now hiv is rising

i have nostalgia now- for a time and place where sex was free an easy and where pleasure didnt result in anything more then a broken heart or the clap, which was cured by horse pills and dr visits

there are those who think its mutated teritary siph.

my queer uncle, my mothers age, old enough for the fun, was living at that time- but he avoided itm because of guilt, because of religon because of family ties

there are those who think its a curse from god

i asked earlier, what i thot i learnt from it

in 1965 jfk fucked monroe in the pool of the white house- cock into cunt- banging pounding-those macho pnetrative words

in 1995 clinton hand an affair with monica in the oval office, used fingers tounges, cigars-never pentrated, never banged, no cock into cunt- queer sex, safe sex

pearl necklace, facial, handjob, blow job, its all aids, its all avoiding being pentrated

i fear being pentrated, pentrating, thats what changed, a whole generation of boys who learnt about fingers and tounges, who talked and neghotied

a whole generation of girls who demanded rubbers, gloves, dental danms, who didnt end up being raped in the back seat of chevys

thats what hiv/aids did for north america

africa/asia/south america

machismo, magick, poverty- whoce populations with out the resources.

millions more then the bubeonic, more then the great influenza, more then tb or typhoid or malaria, countries dying over night, and us oin privelige, ignoring them, looking for the pearls in our pigshit

AZT saved us

AZT is too expensive

Protease inhibtors saved us

Protease inhibtors are under patent

thats the great gift of mandela, making the drugs generic, distrubting them for noting, along with condoms and education

What i thot of before becoming catholic wasnt being queer or the borgias or the jews, it was condoms

not birth control, but disease pervention

millions are dying, those tubes of latex need to be given to be saved

they used to be made of lambskin- during the last plauge of this sort- 17th , 18th, 19th century- 300 yrs to discover a cure for siphylis, and arsenic and mercury and lambskin condoms were used in the mean time

are azt and protease our aresnic and mercury

it was called siphylssis after a sheep herder- and the italins balmed it on the french and the french blamed it on the greeks.
now we blame it on the africans or the fags or any numbe rof others

do we blame cancer ?
cant we trat it like concer ?
a disease with out hte history, the morality, the idelogy ?