IF I were fierce, and bald, and short of breath,
I¡¯d live with scarlet Majors at the Base,
And speed glum heroes up the line to death.
You¡¯d see me with my puffy petulant face,
Guzzling and gulping in the best hotel,
Reading the Roll of Honour. ¡®Poor young chap,¡¯
I¡¯d say¡ª¡®I used to know his father well;
Yes, we¡¯ve lost heavily in this last scrap.¡¯
And when the war is done and youth stone dead,
I¡¯d toddle safely home and die¡ªin bed.